Monday, July 11, 2022

Distancing ourselves from gossip TB Ketubot 5

 


On today’s daf TB Ketubot 5, Bar Kappara provides a more positive reason why a virgin is married on Wednesday and a widow on Thursday. “Come and hear proof, as bar Kappara taught: A virgin is married on Wednesday and engages in intercourse on Thursday, since the blessing to the fish: Be fruitful and multiply, was stated on the fifth day of Creation. A widow is married on Thursday and engages in intercourse on Friday, since the blessing of procreation was stated to man on the sixth day of Creation.” (Sefaria.org translation) Not only is procreation a mitzvah, children are a blessing. The marriage should be blessed with children who are a blessing to their parents.

The Gemara continues to bring further teachings of Bar Kappara unrelated to our topic. “Bar Kappara taught: What is the meaning of that which is written: And you shall have a peg among your weapons [azenekha]” (Deuteronomy 23:14)? Do not read it as: Your weapons [azenekha]. Rather, read it: On your ear [oznekha], meaning that if a person hears an inappropriate matter, he should place his finger, which is shaped like a peg, into his ears. And that is what Rabbi Elazar said: Why are the fingers of a person similar to pegs? The Gemara asks: What is the reason that Rabbi Elazar said that fingers are like pegs? If we say that it is due to the fact that they are discrete from each other, each and every finger was designated for its own discrete, sacred matter, as the Master said: This small finger is for measuring a span, the distance between the little finger to the tip of the thumb used in measuring the breastplate of the High Priest; this next finger is used for taking a fistful of the meal-offering; this middle finger is used for measuring a cubit, the distance from the elbow to the tip of the middle finger; this one next to the thumb is the finger used to sprinkle the blood of offerings on the altar; this is the thumb, on which the blood and oil is placed in the purification ritual of a leper.

Rather, the question is: What is the reason that they are pointed like pegs? It is so that if a person hears an inappropriate matter, he will place his fingers in his ears. Similarly, a Sage of the school of Rabbi Yishmael taught: Why is the entire ear hard and the earlobe soft? It is so that if a person hears an inappropriate matter, he will bend his earlobe into his ear to seal it. The Sages taught: A person should not allow his ears to hear idle matters. Because of the fact that ears are very sensitive and are the first of the limbs burned, one should make certain not to expose them to anything problematic.” (Sefaria.org translation)

Even though we’ve seen people (at least actors in the movies) put their fingers in their ears and make loud noises to prevent from hearing something[1], I don’t believe the rabbis were instructing us literally to put our fingers or earlobes in our ears when we might hear gossip or anything else inappropriate. Nevertheless, we should distance ourselves like the Chofetz Hayim from the sin of lashon har’a- לשון הרע, gossip, and rikhilut- רכילות, slander.

“The Chofetz Hayim was once traveling in a wagon with horse dealers. His traveling companions were discussing topics relating to horses and cattle. In the middle of the conversation, one of the travelers began to speak against another dealer.

“The Chofetz Hayim reprimanded them for speaking and listening to loshon hara, and asked them to continue discussing animals rather than people. When the Chofetz Hayim saw that the dealers refused to heed him, he asked the wagon driver to stop, and got off in the middle-of-the-road. (Rabbi Shmuel Pliskin in Der Chofetz Hayim, pp. 93-94 as quoted in Zelig Pliskins’ book Love your Neighbor, page 191)



[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11-FtDGIb20

No comments:

Post a Comment