What is one of the most dreaded questions a husband hears? “Honey, does this dress make me look fat?” How should a husband respond? Tomorrow’s daf TB Baba Metzia 87 shares some advice to preserve harmony within the family.
Before
we take out the Torah on Shabbat mornings we pray “…Not in man do I put my trust, nor do
I rely on any angel; but only in the God of heaven Who is the true God, Whose
Torah is truth, Whose prophets are true, and Who performs many deeds of
goodness and truth.” God’s seal is truth. When we tell the truth we can say
that we have God’s seal of approval. But are their times a little white lie is
appropriate? Answer is yes.
In the
beginning of parashat Vayera, Genesis
18, Abraham and Sarah are informed and year from then they will have a child.
This is a really unbelievable message because Sarah was 89 years old and Abraham
was 99 years old according to the Torah. It was so improbable, that Sarah laughed
at the possibility.
“The Gemara analyzes the verses that describe Sarah at the time: “And Sarah laughed within herself, saying: After I am waxed old [veloti] shall I have pleasure [edna]” (Genesis 18:12)…
“It is written that Sarah said: “And my lord is old” (Genesis 18:12), and it is written: “And the Lord said to Abraham: Why did Sarah laugh, saying: Shall I certainly bear a child, and I am old?” (Genesis 18:13). This verse indicates that the Holy One, Blessed be He, did not repeat to Abraham that which Sarah actually said, that her husband is old. Why did God change the wording of her statement so that she was referring to herself?
"The school of Rabbi Yishmael taught: Peace is of such great importance that even the Holy One, Blessed be He, altered the truth for the sake of preserving peace, as it is stated: ‘And Sarah laughed within herself, saying: After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, and my lord is old,; and it is written: ‘And the Lord said to Abraham: Why did Sarah laugh, saying: Shall I certainly bear a child, and I am old?’”
To preserve peace and harmony within
the family, we can follow God’s lead and tell a little white lie.
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