Today’s daf TB Megillah 15 lays out the source for ten prohibitions and
three obligations the mourner observes. Now those who are ostracized (מְנוּדִּין ) and those stricken with tzar’at (מְצוֹרָעִין) share some of these prohibitions and obligations, but not all
of them. The Gemara analyzes whether they observe these prohibitions and
obligations or not. Since I am only going to share with you mourning halakhot, I recommend that you study the
entire daf, if you’re interested in
learning when these laws converge and diverge.
Instead of following the Gemara presentation
of these halakhot, I’m going to
present the three obligations first and then the ten prohibitions to organize
these laws for you. All translations are from Sefaria.org.
The obligations:
1
1.“A mourner is obligated to wrap his head
as a sign of mourning, covering his head and face. This is derived from the
fact that the Merciful One says to Ezekiel, while he is in mourning: “And cover not
your upper lip” (Ezekiel
24:17). God commands Ezekiel
not to display outward signs of mourning, which proves by inference that
everyone else is obligated to wrap their heads in this manner.”
2. “A mourner is obligated to rend his clothes. This is derived from the fact that
the Merciful One says to the sons of Aaron:
“Neither rend your clothes” (Leviticus 10:6), which proves by inference
that everyone else, all other mourners, are obligated to rend their
clothes.” (This
is the back story. After Aaron’s two sons Nadav and Avihu died by the hands of
Heaven because they offered up alien fire which God had not enjoined upon them,
Moses instructed his brother the high priest how to behave. “And Moses said to Aaron and to his sons Eleazar and
Ithamar, “Do not bOr “dishevel your hair.” bare your heads-b
and do not rend your clothes, lest you die and anger strike the whole
community. But your kinsmen, all the house of Israel, shall bewail the burning
that the LORD has wrought.” (Leviticus 10:6)
3. “A
mourner is obligated to overturn his bed, so that he sleeps on the underside of
it, as bar Kappara taught a baraita that states: God stated: I have placed the
likeness of My image [deyokan] within humans, as they were created
in My image, and owing to their sins I have overturned it, as when this
person died the Divine image in him was removed. Therefore, you must also overturn
your beds on account of this.
Ezekiel, who was a priest himself, prophesied
the word of the Lord to the Jews in Babylonia. Many times God instructs His Prophets
to behave in a symbolic manner to convey His message. God tells him: “O mortal, I am about to take away the delight of your eyes from you through
pestilence; but you shall not lament or weep or let your tears flow. Moan softly; observe no mourning for
the dead: Put on your turban and put your sandals on your feet; do not cover over
your upper lip, and do not eat the bread of comforters.”g Lit.
“men.” In the evening my wife died, and in the morning I did as I had been
commanded.”
Tosefot ד"ה בִּשְׁאֵילַת שָׁלוֹם
notes
that God tells Ezekiel to act like a mourner and not like a mourner at the same
time. Symbolically Ezekiel is telling the Israelites that tragically will
before them, but they will not be able to show their mourning.
Those who are familiar with our mourning
practices will recognize that we no longer observe wrapping our heads or
overturning our beds.
The prohibitions:
1.
“The
source for the halakha that it is prohibited for a mourner to
receive a haircut is derived from the fact that the Merciful
One states to the sons of Aaron:
“Let not the hair of your heads go loose” (Leviticus 10:6). It was prohibited for them to
let their hair grow long during their period of mourning over the death of
their brothers, Nadav and Avihu. By inference, it is
teaching that for everyone else, i.e., non-priests, it is prohibited
to cut their hair during the period of mourning.”
2.
“The
Gemara moves on to another halakha: A mourner is prohibited from
donning phylacteries (tefillin-gg).
This is derived from the fact that the Merciful One says to Ezekiel, while he is in
mourning: “Bind your headwear [pe’er] upon yourself” (Ezekiel 24:17). The word pe’er
alludes to phylacteries. Ezekiel
was unique in that he was commanded to put on phylacteries while in mourning,
which proves by inference that everyone else is prohibited from
doing so.” (This halakha only applies
to the first day of mourning. Shulkhan Aruk, Orekh Hayim, 38:5 and Yoreh De’ah
488:1-gg)
3.
“The
Gemara continues: A mourner is prohibited from greeting others or be
greeted. This is derived from the fact that the Merciful One says to Ezekiel: “Sigh in silence” (Ezekiel 24:17), implying
that aside from what was absolutely essential, he was prohibited from speaking.”
(During the first three days of mourning, the mourner does not greet nor
respond to greetings because the sages consider these days the deepest of
mourning. The rest of the week the mourner may not initiate a greeting, but may
respond to one.-gg)
4.
“A
mourner is prohibited from studying words of Torah. This prohibition
is derived from the fact that the Merciful One says to Ezekiel: “Sigh in silence”
(Ezekiel 24:17). Ezekiel was commanded to be silent
and not discuss even Torah matters.”
5.
“A
mourner is prohibited from laundering his clothes, as it is written: “And Joab sent to Tekoa, and fetched from
there a wise woman, and said to her, I pray you, feign yourself to be a
mourner, and put on now mourning apparel, and do not anoint yourself with oil,
but be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead”
(II Samuel 14:2).” (This is the back story. King David’s son Amnon raped
his half-sister Tamar. Tamar’s brother Avshalom had Amnon murdered to avenge his
sister’s violation. Avshalom fled from his father and remain away for three
years. “King David was pining away for Avshalom, for [the king] had gotten over
Amnon’s death.” Leviticus 13: 39)
6.
“A
mourner is prohibited from performing work, as it is written: “And I will turn
your Festivals into mourning” (Amos
8:10). The Gemara infers: Just as a Festival is a time when it is prohibited
to work, so too, a mourner is prohibited from performing work.”
7.
“A
mourner is prohibited from bathing, as it is written: “And do not anoint
yourself with oil, but be as a woman that had for a long time mourned for
the dead” (II Samuel 14:2). And bathing is included in the category
of anointing, as both activities have a similar goal, i.e., cleanliness.”
8.
“A
mourner is prohibited from wearing (only
leather shoes—gg) shoes. Since the Merciful One says to Ezekiel with regard to how his
mourning rites should differ from the accepted custom: “And put your shoes
upon your feet” (Ezekiel
24:17), which shows by inference that everyone else, i.e., all other
mourners, is prohibited from wearing shoes.”
9.
“The
Gemara considers another issue: A mourner is prohibited from engaging in
sexual relations, as it is written: “And David comforted Bath-Sheba his wife, and went into her, and lay
with her” (II Samuel 12:24), after their son had died. This proves by
inference that initially, during the period of mourning, sexual relations were
forbidden.” (This is the back story. King David impregnated Bat Sheva, a
woman married to Uriah, one of his soldiers. King David instructed his general Yoav
to place Uriah on the front lines of a heated battle to ensure his death. When
news arrived that Uriah died, King David married Bat Sheva. Their baby
conceived in sin died at birth.-gg)
10.
“A mourner may not send his offerings
to the Temple, as it is taught in a baraita: Rabbi Shimon
says: A peace-offering [shelamim] is given this name also to
teach us that one may sacrifice it only at a time when he is whole [shalem]
and his mind is settled, but not at a time when he is an acute mourner,
i.e., on the first day of his bereavement, when he is distressed.” (Obviously
now that the Temple is destroyed and sacrifices are no longer offered, this halakha is no longer observed as well.-gg)